De Pulse Magazine: Editorial Intern (Day 9)

So, I’ve finally landed a job. It's the ninth day since I've been working as the Editorial Intern at the soon to be published De Pulse, a magazine intent on providing good writing on Guyanese entertainment.

As far as qualifications go I’m probably a novice when it comes to being an editorial intern, although that’s neither here nor there given that I’m still uncertain as to what exactly an editorial intern is. People keep asking me what I do on the job, and I keep telling them,“Whatever Ruel (my boss) tells me to”, which is about as vague as you can get. Seven days is probably too short a time to decide if I’m doing anything noteworthy at the magazine or just tagging alone. On the fifth day Ruel told me I’m doing excellent work. I’m not sure what he meant since I didn’t think I’d done anything yet. I was probably being irrational when I figured he was playing with my mind...I’ve got no idea what he’s going to say when we reach fifty days.

Still, I can’t say I’m unexcited about working on a magazine even if the job description seems ceremonial. Really, I’ve only been doing this for a week and half so I guess the bulk of the work hasn’t really hit me yet. I’m just one of those neurotics who thinks if it’s not stressing me out, it’s not work...and I’m not sure I’ve been doing any work, just sort of helping out.

I’m used to writing reviews and talking cinema over at my blog – having become increasingly enamoured of movies over the past two years – yet I’ve retained many qualities of the intellectual snob, particularly that pride (self importance?) about being a somewhat avid reader. They keep saying reading’s a dying art, but I’m not sure if the art’s dying or the quality of the available writing is waning. It’s probably an egg and chicken argument.

People intent on reading entertainment writing keep flocking to the internet for the most ridiculous entertainment news from overseas – and it’s not even well written. True, people seem to have some sort of a sick affinity to written trash, but I’m still naive enough to believe that something that’s really good will sell. I mean, who doesn’t want to read a good magazine? Bored out of my head I’ve even sunk so low as to read my sisters’ Seventeen magazine – a plethora of crap I knew little about (so, I’m not blameless), but on the off chance that it’s actually a good article, does it really matter if I went in with any previous knowledge?

Fine, blame it on the lack of good writing, but with De Pulse here I don’t think that excuse is going to be valid anymore – more than a generic entertainment magazine De Pulse is intent on being an article with good writing.

A confession: I can’t say I’m au fait with Guyanese talent, something that should probably make me feel horrible since I am working helping out at a magazine intent on showcasing Guyanese talent. The thing is, I don’t think you have to know about Guyanese talent to enjoy De Pulse. Good writing is good writing, and at this publication, that’s a guarantee.

Stay tuned.

Feeling De Pulse

Okay. I think this blog needs to start off with my most embarrassing moment in entertainment journalism, which is also incidentally my most embarrassing moment in journalism ever, and definitely in the top five of embarrassing moments of my entire life.

So, it's a couple of years ago and WildFire Entertainment was just launched and has brought in Alison Hinds and a couple of artistes for some show. I show up at Jonathan Beepat's house in Bel Air Gardens and stride in the gate, editor of what was then the hottest entertainment supplement (seriously, ask anybody) in the country, Weekend Confidential. Indeed, when one of the muscles at the gate stopped me, another one who knew me from some club or the other was like, "Yo, let de man through."

The interview session that Wildfire had arranged was a round robin type thing, with each journalist getting five minutes with each of the participating artistes. So, after ignoring D'Hitman, but paying full attention to the ample bar (hic), it's my turn to interview Alison Hinds, the star of the show. I present a transcript of sorts, for your elucidation:

"Ruel: Good, um, good afternoon, Ms. Hinds.

Alison: Good afternoon...

Ruel: First, um... ah, first of all, I just want to say I'm a big fan. (Ed. Note: 'Roll it Gyal' is still one of my favourite songs of all time, particularly when I'm receiving a backball to it, but "big fan" was stretching the truth a lil bit at the time.)

Alison: That's good to know. Thank you.

Ruel: So, how are you enjoying your first visit to Guyana?

Alison: I... have... been... to... Guyana... before... more... than... once.... (Ed. Said in that particular tone reserved for retarded differently intellectual people.)

Ruel: Okay... [Pause] Okay. [Time for redemption with a smart question here.] I've noticed that there has been a marked change in your music ever since you left Krosfyah.

Alison: Well, I would say that there definitely has been a change in my music since I left Square One, which was the band I was in.

Ruel: Um... um... thank you, Ms. Hinds. Looking forward to the show."

If ever there is one person on the planet that believes that I'm 'differently intellectual', it is Alison Hinds, and I promise the next time I get a chance, I am going to interview the ass off of that woman, and you' should know that's a lot of interviewing right thurr.

The reason I introed with that little anecdote is to show that I am intimately familiar with how easy it is for entertainment writers in Guyana to not take their subject seriously, and this - is in the words of my dear friend, Elton John - "a sad, sad situation, and it's getting more and more absurd".

The other night, I watched all of five minutes of an episode of the American show, Dancing With the Stars, and saw Bristol Palin - whose claim to fame is becoming an unmarried pregnant teen while being the daughter of a US Vice-Presidential candidate who shot furry creatures and preached abstinence - being featured as a star. And it's not that I don't like trash TV, because I like my midget interracial incest melodrama like any other average man, but what I've come to realise is that we are being fed all this trash without the options of more refined fare that is available to the societies that are feeding us said trash. And it's not only television.

Every single Sunday, prime column space in every single local paper is dedicated to some ditzy stuff from Bollywood and Hollywood, not because there is any scientific evidence that these things sell more papers - particularly in an age when people would have already read it online or seen it on television - but simply because somewhere back in time this slow consensus of idiocy seems to have been formed on what the public needs for its entertainment news. The weird thing is, a newspaper's value is directly linked to exclusivity, yet we see the same stories published in all four daily papers, and yet they continue.

Meanwhile, I have seen, in the few weeks since we've launched this venture, at least five singers who individually warrant more space in the Sunday papers than the space dedicated to Lindsay Lohan and Brangelina combined.

Let me state herel, I don't believe in non-critical journalism, writing that sets out with the specific intention of pulling punches, because it is simply not journalism - it's either propaganda or PR.

De Pulse was founded on the premise that local entertainment deserves better than flowery, uninspired Q&A type things that proliferate in what currently passes for entertainment writing, not only in Guyana but throughout the region. I don't think there is any excuse for it, even the prevalent one that non-critical writing is somehow linked to development; nobody gets better by people lying to them that they are a certain standard when they're not.

Conversely, lazy journalism does not do justice to true talent. What I fail to see out there is the mechanism of showcasing our best creative minds not only to the world, but even to our own people. On Facebook, over the phone, in person, Guyanese people get into arguments over who really should have won America's Got Talent, while our artistes are crying out for attention in their own society.

I'm going to be frank - I don't think the existing entertainment publications - print or online - have done anything significant for local entertainment in their own right, and that is primarily because journalism has never been a part of their mandate. What we've had is the exploitation of a need, not the fulfillment of it,

This is where De Pulse comes in. We intend not only to raise the standard of entertainment journalism in the Caribbean, we intend to define it, refine and package it. And then we're going to ship that package out so that Lindsay Lohan is going to be reading about our celebrities, our talent, granted from her prison cell of the week. And I can personally assure you, that anybody brings me an article that mentions Alison Hinds being in Krosfyah, that will be the last article I ever look at from them.

Time you start feeling De Pulse, coming this November.